Of Anal Sex and Cooking Oil

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Hello, dear friends.  This is going to be a short one.  I was reminiscing about the good old days when I was still young and good looking and could use sex to get what I want, and I remembered this one time I just had to share with the world.

Some time ago, I was with this guy – it doesn’t matter which one, there’ve been so many.  We had been fighting about something.  Doesn’t matter what, though, I think it had something to do with me tricking him into something or other.  Anyhow, we hadn’t been having sex much lately because, let’s face it, even though I was cute I wasn’t all that great in bed after the 5th or 6th time – kind of repetitive, mundane.  Well, being like so many other women who were raised by parents who just didn’t give a shit, I’ve always equated sex with love.  And since the frequency of the sex had been declining that had to mean he didn’t love me any more.

So, one day, in an effort to re-affirm his love for me, I tried seducing him.  It wasn’t working.  I offered to “let” him do me anally.  He wasn’t really into that but, like most men, he’s up for it because he knows it’s something most women don’t like.  Unfortunately, we had no lube.  And it wouldn’t have benefited either of us to pursue that avenue without lubricant.

I proposed to him a little Crisco (or whatever brand was in the kitchen).  I caught a fleeting look of disgust across his face – ever so slight, but there nonetheless.  It was quickly replaced with a look of disdain, like “How could I possibly ever respect a woman that would take it in the ass, with 100% vegetable oil, because she is too stupid and too emotionally stunted to separate love from sex?”.  He agreed.

We did it.  That’s right, kids, your mother proposed and proceeded with having anal sex, using cooking oil as a lubricant.  It was awkward and uncomfortable and I think I got a rash or some kind of irritation from it.  If I had any self respect, any shame at all, I would be disgusted with myself.  But I don’t – so it’s all good.  And anyway, I’ve done much worse over the years.

Next time I’ll tell you about the time I was living in my car, had unprotected sex with a guy I barely knew, and didn’t shower for days afterward.  God, I’m a nasty skank.

 

58 Responses to Of Anal Sex and Cooking Oil

  1. Chris Sweeney says:

    After working with her for the past 2 years I have to say what a useless skank she is ! She was bragging once about being a topless dancer and escort in Florida,I mean who brags about stuff like that ? She bragged once about doing some of the best “coke” in Florida at parties with the other dancers. I know one of the employees here still knows James and I’ll have to ask him to call him and ask him WTF is going on and how long he is going to put up with this unemployable druggie,just unreal !

    • Patrick Fox says:

      Indeed, when I met her was just after she stopped stripping. She had stopped stripping because she got arrested at the club where she was dancing and had fled Florida.

      As for James, I have no personal opinion of him because I’ve never spoken or dealt with him. I’ve had a background check done on him (I gotta know who’s living in the house my son is living in, after all), but there was nothing found to give me cause for concern. Other than the very poor judgement of getting mixed up with Desiree, he seems like a reasonable person.

      But I can understand getting sucked in by Desiree – after all, I was blinded enough to marry her and have a child with her, and I consider myself a pretty level headed, reasonable person. Though, in my defence, 15 years ago she was a lot better looking than she is now.

      • John ford says:

        Robert Fox: you’re a fucking nut job. You married this lady and had a child with her, this despite her alleged past? Evidently you are NOT level headed and never were, not then and not now. So we have this straight in our minds because you seem to have it crooked in your delusional mind; mommy was a stripper and you were attracted to her and then decided to marry her and have a child by her and you were just the little lamb, seduced and sacked in by her, led off to the slaughter? Who the fuck are you trying to kid? Question: how many skank ho strippers did you work your way through ( condom or no condom) before your 15 year ago level headed neutrons signalled to you that you’re making the best choice for yourself in (A) First tucking that 10 dollar bill into her g-string because after all you are an impressive big spender then (B) Go for that lap dance and rub job then (C) Date and marry this woman that you find so unflattering? When did you go from tasteful to disdainful? Of course, once you moderate this narrative about you, I am certain you don’t have the stones to post it now do you?

  2. Mark Hamill says:

    Stumbled on to your absolutely insane, narcissistic and delusional rants here. Great dad…dragging your child through a public knife fight with his unarmed mother. He’s gonna need as much therapy when he’s older as you clearly do now. Your public use of your child as a pawn in whatever twisted revenge fantasy you’ve hallucinated is likely illegal. But it is certainly despicable and engenders sympathy for the very target of your childish ravings. Here’s hoping the cops find you, but quick. As for the stormfront logo…pretty much says to the world, “I’m a hateful asshole who hasn’t read a history book and I live in a fantasy land in which douchebags like me tell eachother that we matter, even though we’re really just psychotic losers who couldn’t hold a steady job.” So, yeah…keep up this revenge bullshit and have a long life, so you can have some years to live with the consequences of your illness. Or you could go get help.

    • Patrick Fox says:

      In fact, I have discussed this website with my son on a number of occasions over the past 2 years that it’s been up. His consist response has been “Why should I care what you write about Desiree on that site?”

      You see, when a parent has been out of a child’s life – by her own choice – for 9 years; then suddenly forces herself back into the child’s life when he’s 11 years old; then abducts the child, taking him to another state, away from the people who have raised him and cared for him his whole life; then files a report with ICE (US Immigration) to get the custodial parent – the parent that actually stayed and raised the child – deported so she could get custody by default…well, in those cases the child usually doesn’t have much respect for such a mother.

      Now, as for “revenge”, well, I’m simply reporting facts about Desiree. How can reporting what is true be considered “revenge”? If a person is doing something they are so ashamed of that they don’t want it publicly known then they probably shouldn’t be doing that thing.

      And as for what I’m doing being illegal: Desiree has already filed numerous reports with the RCMP, the Phoenix Police, and the Sahuarita Police to try to get this website taken down. In each case the authorities (including the various courts she has cried to) have determined there is nothing illegal about this website – neither criminal nor civil.

      It almost sounds like you’re saying you believe Desiree’s approach to things is better – take what you want by force or deceit; spread lies about the other person; the end will justify the means as long as you get what you want.

      And why would you say “his unarmed mother”? Have you not noticed that she was the one that pushed her way into mine and my son’s lives and started creating all these problems for us? Is she not the one that initiated all of this nonsense? Am I not merely reciprocating what she, herself, has already done against me? Has she not done drastic things, like having me arrested and physically banished from the country I was born in, the country I spent all of my life, because she realized she would not be able to get custody of our son through the proper legal channels, and that our son would never voluntarily live with her?

      • Ian says:

        As for the amount of stupidity that I hear coming from you I am Sages old friend and Ill tell you that from everything that ive seen disgusts me. If you want your son back there is multiple ways this couldve been done scamming everyone with stupidity is not one take down the site man this is not right im only 13 but since youve whineing about how she has your son. Realise that she is the mother. When I spent the night over not once was there ever problems besides the fact that she was scared of you wanting to get away dont do that. You may be older and superieor but not more mature. Not wanting fights this should just end, its not about you or her its about G***** hes the one that matters and if you think that destroying her is better. Just think about that

        • Rob says:

          Ok, getting sick of the people thinking a woman isn’t capable of total deception and incredible evil merely based on the fact she is a woman.

    • Monster Cock says:

      Hey Mark, who died and made you all high and mighty? Go back in your room and wait for your mother to massage your asshole with her tongue.

  3. Patrick Fox says:

    I agree with you, completely, that “its about G*****”. G***** and I were happy and content with our lives without her – then she was the one that forced herself into the situation and started doing things like sneaking around behind peoples’ backs and whisking G***** away to another state, then lying to the court (e.g. claiming I “hid” G***** from her for 9 years).

    Tell me: How is it that people like you are able to completely ignore all the horrendous things someone like Desiree has done in the past and when that past catches up with them you believe the world should show them compassion?

    If you walk up to someone on the street and punch them in the face, then you can’t cry foul when they punch you back. I’m not doing anything to Desiree that she hasn’t already done to me first – I’m just much better at it.

    You should also realize, looking out for G*****’s interests and revealing the kind of person Desiree really is are not mutually exclusive. There’s no reason a person cannot pursue both simultaneously.

    You should also consider that G***** has never expressed any desire for me to remove this website. In his words: “Why should I care what you right about her?” It’s naive and delusional to think that a child could possibly love, respect, or care about a “parent” who split when they were a year and a half old, then came back when they were 11, only to cause nothing but problems, take them away by force, and force them into a lifestyle and home they didn’t want to be in.

    As for Sage: I don’t know him and so I have no opinion of him. Statistically, however, given the environment he’s grown up in (i.e. with Desiree and Michael), he doesn’t have much chance of ever being anything more than a white trash, pothead…like his parents. But that’s just statistics.

    • Ian says:

      I cant say I agree with everything but what I can say is that you shouldnt judge a book by its cover as for michael ive never met him because I was in AZ at the time they were but saying that I would say foul as that sort of way is not how matters should be taken “lightly” like you are of the entire conversation/ arguement that it has become.

      • Patrick Fox says:

        Hello, Ian.

        I’ve never met Michael in person, but I’ve had occasional interactions with him. Also, you often don’t need to know someone to know what kind of person they are – you can deduce that from their conduct, the choices they make, et cetera.

        I generally would not be hostile with someone unless they initiated the hostility. In the case of Desiree and me: I was the one that tracked her down after 9 years and contacted her to see if maybe she might want to have some type of involvement in G*****’s life. She’s the one that seized that opportunity to start scheming to take G***** by force; to show up without notice and abduct him to Arizona behind my back; to contact my friends, business associates, rabbi, and family, and tell them all kinds of horrendous lies about me (for who knows what reason); filing false reports with Homeland Security. This website is essentially the same thing she was doing to me back in 2012, when I still had custody of G***** – only it’s much more effective, and I’m much more motivated.

  4. Ian says:

    Dont include Sage he has nothing to do with this and you need to learn the difference what is wrong and right calling him white trash is dumb because you say its not opinion its statistics thats psychotic just like the stalking you’ve been doing and sure I may not know and what you said about me saying foul in that sort of situation would be stupid if I punch him its only right to punch back

    • Patrick Fox says:

      I don’t believe I’ve ever said anything negative about Sage on this website (or anywhere, for that matter). At one point I did include him in the “Friends” page, but after some thought I decided it wasn’t really fair because he is just a child and he didn’t choose to be associated with Desiree.

      My comment about him likely growing up to be white trash is because most people carry on the behavior and culture they grew up in – mainly because that’s all they know and that’s what they’re familiar/comfortable with. It’s not Sage’s fault that both his parents are nasty, trailer park losers. And, he’s not destined to carry on that way of life if he decides he wants something better.

      I think you need to review the definition of “stalking” (I don’t mean that in a condescending way). I, as G*****’s father, have a right (both legally and morally) to know where he is living and the circumstances of his living environment. just like if he was living with me then Desiree would have the same rights. Desiree has a history of hooking up with very dangerous, violent men, and drug users (e.g. Kristopher Lauchner). She also has a history of deliberately trying to conceal her’s and her boyfriends’ wrongdoing. So, when I see that she deliberately provided a false address and she refused to inform me where she would be “keeping” G*****, I had every right to be concerned and to investigate her and James. It’s not stalking – it’s responsible parenting.

      The analogy I provided about a stranger punching you was to put in perspective that over the past few years Desiree has done all this horrible stuff to me, to G*****, and to friends of mine that had nothing to do with any of this; and now that things aren’t going well for and the years of treating people like shit are catching up with her are we supposed to forget all the terrible things she’s done?

      Did you know, years ago, when I was on hard times, I asked her if she could contribute to a pair of shoes for G***** and she refused? She wouldn’t pitch in $10 measly dollars! Is that REALLY someone I’m supposed to feel compassion for?

      By the way, you seem very intelligent for 13 years old.

    • Patrick Fox says:

      Ian:

      You know what? You’re right. Sage has done nothing wrong and doesn’t deserve to be publicly associated with Desiree in this way. When I get some time this week or weekend I will remove all references to him from this site.

  5. Ian says:

    Ok yeah thanks for the compliment I am a gifted student and have extremely good vocab but sure I mean she has done these bad things and especially with the ten dollars thing I mean yeah i agree that it may have been wrong but some people of their sorts they tend to know what would be better for themselves as people so the outcome of our son can not really be fully achieved until he gets to 16 or so where he some rights to pick where he wants to live. Maybe by then he’ll choose you but there is always the possibility that he does not want to anymore so once he has the chance to make the choice maybe he shall but no one cant really control who they are so just wait til then maybe youll get the answer youve been waiting for

    • Patrick Fox says:

      I’m very open with our son about where he wants to live. I would never force him to live with me against his will. We’ve discussed this many times. When I request something in the family court it’s because our son has told me that’s what he wants.

      I believe it is wrong and harmful to force a child to live with a parent they don’t want to. All it does is makes the child resent the parent and, often, results in rebellious behavior.

  6. Ian says:

    And that thing you said about her hating mexicans mustve changed because I am of hispanic descent and im pretty sure she knew too so I am not so sure about that

    • Patrick Fox says:

      My claims of Desiree hating Mexicans are based on her own words, in her own emails (see, for example http://www.desireecapuano.com/mail/?msgid=0515). When I was with her she used to go on and on about how she hated Mexicans and Cubans. She was living with Kristopher Lauchner – a white supremist – until his incarceration in 2012.

      Desiree is very effective at portraying herself as a kind, loving, caring person – especially to those who don’t know her. But read through some of her emails on this website and you start to get a different perception of her.

  7. Ian says:

    Ok I will I really wont take much offense to it since it doesnt matter and yeah I was there about 3 times two of them Kristopher was there at

  8. Ian says:

    And I know just because I dont take offense doesnt meant everyone else will

    • Patrick Fox says:

      Indeed. But that raises the question: If someone gets made at Desiree because they read on this site that she’s racist and hates Mexicans then do they hate her because she’s racist or because I informed them that she’s racist?

      By the way, I’m sorry, I didn’t have a chance to update the site (to remove references to Sage) yet. I’ve been very busy preparing my appeal briefs for the silly Order of Protection and Injunction Against Harassment that Desiree and James filed against me. This week, I promise.

  9. Ian says:

    Im kind of confused what is the raised question

    • Patrick Fox says:

      The question is: Would a person, who decides they hate Desiree after reading this website, hate her because she’s racist, or because I informed them (through this website) that she’s racist?

      According to Desiree, it would be my fault because I shouldn’t be publishing such information about her. According to me it would be her fault because what the person hates is the racism – I’m just the messenger.

  10. Ian says:

    I mean a person has the right to speak freely but if they go towards the hates side due to racism then that would be what fits them the best

  11. JBCB says:

    I have some vegetable oil.

  12. Ass Fucker says:

    How much to fuck her ass, and would you ASSist me in fees ASSociated with fucking her ass?

  13. NBilly says:

    So, what about that car story? Sounds like that’s a really good one to show just what a dirty skank she is…

  14. Haywood Jablowme says:

    I’d tap that. Vegetable oil? Just spit on it.

  15. Bub says:

    If she acts like a ho treat her like a ho

    • Patrick Fox says:

      That’s what I’m talkin’ about.

      • Faruk You says:

        Saw your interview on CBC last night Patrick. Good job. You’re a real piece of work, you are.

        You seem rather confident that you’ve met the challenge of Canadian justice. Good for you! Knowing you’re an avid researcher, I’ve provided the following link for your reading and researching pleasure. Enjoy.

        http://www.cbabc.org/For-the-Public/Dial-A-Law/Scripts/Criminal-Law/206

        Now, if you’re lucky and I’m wrong, the Crown that looked at your file re: criminal harassment saw good enough reason to not even consider reviewing the matter. On the other hand, if I’m right, then what you had to say in the interview has a real good chance of you frequently being on the wrong end of a good ass fuck wishing you had some cooking oil.

        Now, that’s what I’m talkin’ about.

        So by all means, keep up the good work!

        Screwing with your son’s head, trying to use him to get back at your ex? You lowlife rat fuck piece of garbage. Know this – he’s not agreeing with the shit talking about his mother you’re doing. He’s doing his best to avoid having to endure listening to any more of it than he has to. Trust me on that. But nobody but you is getting hurt in any of this, are they? And everybody else has to hurt more than you, right? You sorry assed dumb fuck.

        • Patrick Fox says:

          Please clarify how I’m using my son to get back at my ex-wife. He doesn’t want to be with her; he never wanted to be with her; she is the one that started all the hostility back in 2011. My son knows about this website and he’s never expressed any disapproval of it.

          As for your concerns about the legality of the site and my intentions: again, as long as what a person is saying is, in fact, true, and the statements are being made to the general public – not directly to the other party – then it does not rise to the level of harassment.

          If Desiree doesn’t like that I’ve published all this horrible stuff about her then perhaps she should stop doing horrible stuff to people.

          • Rob says:

            Shut up you stupid ass man. I am male and so embarrassed to see blind stupid support for such an irresponsible woman just because she is a woman, who also happened to steal a child from his father. Shut the fuck up.

  16. Pork Chop says:

    Ah the wonders of the internet! The transparency it brings to this world will eventually lead to the erradication of whores, criminals and all that ill bunch.

    Good job! And all the pointing fingers against you or are of people that are afraid of this new world or haven’t taken the time to read the website thoroughly.

    • Megan says:

      It seems to bring out the morons.

      • BlackChevy says:

        Yes it does. I have spent several hours here reading and using logic to figure out what is going on. You have spent several hours as well hurling insults but never giving reason of why Desiree should have the son. Your logic of how her past and present history vs Patricks history are possibly comparable was a real WTF moment.

  17. Gayle says:

    Your son doesn’t know what to make of this now, he’s too young, when he matures and emotionally develops(considering he follows normal development which is doubtful with you as a father) he will hate you for it, I guarantee you that. I’ve lived it but luckily I had amazing grandparents that took me away from the toxic environment and instilled me with their values so I grow up knowing what true selfless love was. Your son will have no chance if dont behave like a grown up. It doesn’t matter what she has done to you, you are just as bad now,actually worse because youre publicly shaming and outing your sons mother. There is no lower form of life than a RAT. You are a bad father. Rationalize it however you need to but you belong in the gutter with her. Hopefully your son comes across a good teacher or other adult figure in his life before it’s too late.

    • Patrick Fox says:

      How can you presume to know how mature my son is? You’ve never met him or spoken with him. Are you suggesting that all people mature, psychologically and/or emotionally, at the same rate – regardless of the circumstances of their lives?

    • Jim says:

      You are truly full of it.

  18. Kimmi says:

    Wow. You’re unreal. Leave the poor woman alone. Try to move on with your life, however; I’m assuming that will be hard considering your bullshit is now all over the news. Everyone will know about you and how fucking crazy you are.

    • Rob says:

      I am beginning to believe this is real, describing a woman who has lost it and trying to keep all her secrets hidden. If there is a child involved in all this and this man is being honest, then some serious shit is going down. Why would he go to this length to lie.

    • Monster Cock says:

      Kimmie, mind your own business you nosey slob and go back to stuffing your fat face while watch the Real Housewives marathon. You cunt stink too??

  19. GOD says:

    You lonely, pathetic loser.

    Move on with your life. Time is short before you burn in hell.

    Fucking cocksucking rat you are. No matter what kind of person she is, this website makes you look 100x worse with ZERO CREDIBILITY.

    Guarentee you got a small dick, shitty job, and havent been laid since she left your sorry ass.

    You mad bro?

    You should be, because you are a fucking waste of skin.

    Eat shit and die faggot.

    • Ron says:

      Most of the comments against Patrick are asking him to “stop”, “move on”. No mention at all about it not being true. And this one is the best, calling him a “rat”.. LOL. Only criminals, people who associate with criminals and children who don’t know better say that. Criminals don’t want criminals to “rat” so they don’t to jail. In civilized society being a “rat” is a good thing. It put’s criminals in jail and in this case it exposes a really, really nasty person. It must be all true or Patrick would be sued for slander/defamation.

      I applaud Patrick for his on going effort to expose this person to the world so that someone else will not suffer at her hands or higher such a deceitful person.

      Patrick is not crazy. He is angry and with very good reason.

  20. Frank the tank says:

    Good job, takes a lot of balls to do that to someone who.fucked over your life like that and I commend you stay strong this site is a symbol for double sided judgements of husbands and fathers everywhere

  21. Ellen says:

    And of course your son is not going to tell you that he disproves of the website or you in any way! Look at what you are doing to his mom! What the fuck would you do to him or say to him if he contradicted you in any way? You are probably the most intimidating and scary person he’s ever even heard of. If he’s smart, he’ll lie to you until he’s 18 and can change his name and escape you. It’s also likely that he is subconsciously lying to you and to himself, because you’re the scariest thing he’s ever seen.

    • Well played! says:

      What is scary is having the ‘Mother’ who abandoned you for 8 years show up and have your father sent away. That is much scarier than some revenge site filled with inconvenient truths about the mother you never knew cause she bailed when you were a baby, then suddenly wanted to play ‘Mommy’ after the hard work is done by a REAL parent that was there for you.

      If YOU were smart, you would be able to see who caused this whole thing: an unfit mother who has manipulated men to achieve her own, short-sighted ends. And now it is blowing up in EVERYONES face as the guy pulls a unique and entirely legal payback.

      • suzy says:

        Amen to that! This is the most true comment on this, or any of the other sites people have talking about this skank on!

    • Rob says:

      Why don’t you stop apologizing for an awful woman because you are one. If you think all women or even most women are sugar, spice and everything nice, you are a deluded feminazi.

  22. Camille says:

    You’re a piece of shit.
    Did you know that, in reality, your revenge hurts you more than it does to your wife ?
    I hope you get run over by a truck.

  23. joe says:

    brilliant keep up the good work I got tangled up with a woman similar to this one I can only dream she gets run over one day .

  24. Monster Cock says:

    This sounds like a woman that needs to get hollowed out. You delectable little skank you!! I for one love what this guy has done. I actually did this a few times to a few different skanks that deserved this. You worried about finding a job honey?? I don’t think the street corner will discriminate against you. Now get out there tonight and earn that money. I will be out looking for you and I will bring some KY Jelly and done Crisco. Your choice baby girl!! All 2,000+ of my Facebook friends will love this. Bitches on blast, rock on bro!!

  25. Monster Cock says:

    Camille needs to get double teamed by a couple of rabid dogs. Shut your mouth and open your legs baby!!

  26. Monster Cock says:

    Desiree, maybe you shouldn’t of been such a cunt?!? When will you vile little feminist pieces of shit figure out men are superior and will always know how to fuck your life up? Can’t bring this down Hun, gotta love the 1st amendment.

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