You See? I Really Was a Stripper…and Prostitute

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You might remember, back in February 2016, when I went on the TV news and claimed everything on this website was all lies.  I insisted I was not a stripper.

Well, today I’m sharing with you the Pinellas County Sheriff police report from the time I was actually arrested at the strip club…for being a stripper.

As [Desiree] entered the stage she was wearing a multicolored flowered dress and as she performed she disrobed…I observed her to be wearing pasties over the areolas of her breasts and a multicolored flowered T-back. During her performance she exposed the cleavage of the…buttocks by bending over with her back to the audience while gyrating her pelvic area.  She also raised her leg over her head as she held the pole on the dance floor.

– Pinellas County Sheriff’s Office

Police report of my arrest at the strip club

Police report of my arrest at the strip club

It was September 17, 1999.  I was 18 years old.  I was dancing (stripping) at Christine’s Cabaret, at 3860 Ulmerton Road, in Clearwater, Florida.

In Tampa, it’s illegal to have both nudity and alcohol, so Christine’s was one of those places that had alcohol but not nudity…well, officially, anyway.  There was, technically, no nudity on the main stage, but for the right price anyone could get a private lap dance – and for a little more you could, of course, get “the full treatment”.  The Sheriff’s Department was conducting an undercover operation, looking for violations of that law.  Thank god they only observed the main stage.

An interesting side note: Christine’s is where I met, and started going out with Michael Capuano.  He was a regular customer at Christine’s.  He’d come in to see me while he left his wife and daughter at home.  Of course, we were fucking.  He would come to the club, pay me, and I would fuck him.

Anyway, back to the real point of this post: Patrick claimed on this website that I used to be a stripper and that I was arrested while actually stripping.  I went on national television and insisted that wasn’t true – that I had not been a stripper, that everything on this website was lies and defamatory.  And you all believed me.  Ha! You gullible assholes will believe anything I say, won’t you?

Yeah, I was a stripper.  I made money by dancing, taking my clothes off in front of strange men, gyrating my hips in seductive manner, rubbing my tits in their faces and dry-humping them to get them to give me their money.  And for the ones I liked – or who were willing to pay enough – I fucked them.

Does that make me a prostitute?  Well…actually…yes, it does.

But those days of having sex with strange men for money are long over.  Now, I only have sex with one man – James Pendleton – though there is still a very definite connection between me giving him sex and him giving me compensation.

Desiree Capuano with her current fiancé, James A. Pendleton, Jr, outside their home in Sahuarita, Arizona

Desiree Capuano with her current fiancé, James A. Pendleton, Jr, outside their home in Sahuarita, Arizona

Ah well, once a ho, always a ho, I guess.

13 Responses to You See? I Really Was a Stripper…and Prostitute

  1. morton says:

    LOL!!!! Nice.

  2. Chris Sweeney says:

    We all knew here at Apollo without any doubt she was a druggie skank hoe and this proves it,however some here at Apollo needed no proof as she used to brag here about being a stripper and doing some of the best coke in Florida and being as she put it,”a high class,high price,companion” which of course translates to,low class,cheap,druggie,prostitute ! Thank God she’s gone from here !

    [Comment from the Editor: The “Apollo” Chris refers to is “Apollo Education Group”, where Desiree worked for almost 7 years from February 2008 through September 2015.]
  3. grrr burger says:

    desiree been telling james she was never a stripper. what will james do now he knows she lied to him? must be so humiliating for him.

  4. Mike K. says:

    I was a friend of Kris L. and I don’t think she ever told him she was a stripper and a prostitute either, and I bet for sure she never told her Mother she was a stripper and a prostitute ! I bet her Mother and family and friends visit this site and so now they all know for sure,with proof,what a stripper,druggie,whore she REALLY was,and is,She hasn’t changed either,at least she hadn’t the last time I saw her at Kris’s house.

  5. Mike K. says:

    I don’t know this James dude,but he’s got to have shit for brains and such low self esteem, and low self worth as to be with this known,PROVEN stripper whore that he knows lies to him,,his family, and lies to all of her family,and he supports her ! I wonder if the whore’s kids think it’s cool that their gutter mom was a stripper and a cheap whore ?

  6. Ralph says:

    I knew it!!! You dirty nasty whore. How much to fuck you in the ass with Crisco?

  7. Eagle Northwest says:

    She should go back to strip teasing. It might galvanize her to eat better. She and that loafer look McDonalds hamburgers.

  8. Chris Sweeney says:

    I just read and realized that Desiree the stripper,druggie,whores stage name was Wendy and that’s James mothers name according to this site and court documents,how ironic,sick,but yet funny,maybe James gets a little double tag action from both Wendy’s on those hot Tuscon nights,lol ! Desiree is just such a sick disgusting whore,we knew she was bad here at Apollo,but didn’t realize the extent !

    • Patrick says:

      Indeed. And the naming coincidences don’t end there: she was with Richard Riess, then with Michael Richard Capuano; and from Michael Capuano to Kristopher Michael Lauchner. Doesn’t look like there’s a name connection with James Allen Pendleton, though (unless, maybe she was with someone between Kristopher and James – which is highly probable).

      Bit of trivia: Desiree once told me that her song of choice when she would dance on the main stage was “She’s a Beauty” by The Tubes.

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